I thought my marriage would last forever...

Like many before me, I thought my marriage would last forever. When it came down to it, my decision to divorce was not a sudden realization – it was a journey. The path I would end up taking would prove to be tumultuous and adversarial.

‍Before heading down this path, I met with an attorney for pre-divorce education. This attorney helped me understand more about the process of divorce and what my next steps should be. This small but informative step was instrumental in helping me prepare.

Several years later, when we decided that divorce was the only option forward, we did what most people do: We hired attorneys to begin the divorce process.

It was adversarial from the start. We were instructed not to discuss divorce-related matters and also encouraged not to work together. Right off the bat, we were controlled by–rather than controlling–the process.

‍If we had known about an alternative divorce model called Collaborative Divorce, things might have been different. In a Collaborative Divorce, both parties agree to settle the case out-of-court with no threat of litigation. For this reason, a Collaborative Divorce attorney is a great alternative to the traditional divorce model.

‍Instead, after six months and several thousand dollars, we had nothing to show for our time, money, or the emotional turmoil we’d been through. With the information we gathered from our time with our attorneys, we sat down with a pad of paper and a calculator to draft the stipulations of our Separation Agreement.

In hindsight, we were the ideal couple for mediation. We agreed the marriage was over; we wanted to handle our divorce civilly; we could make sound decisions without a judge; we were committed to fairly dividing our assets; we wanted a healthy co-parenting partnership; and, like anyone going through a divorce, we wanted to save time, money, and unnecessary emotional turmoil.

This understanding inspired me to open ROAD to RESOLUTION in 2011 as a non-attorney mediator. Ultimately, I desired to meet all people – individually or as a couple – on their road toward resolution, so I enrolled in law school and passed the North Carolina and South Carolina bar exams. I obtained a law degree in order to expand on the services I was able to offer my clients. As a result, ROAD to RESOLUTION is a place where cooperation and collaboration are cultivated, and the best interest of the family remains the focus.

Today, I am happily remarried and the mother of five children. I have the unique personal experience of my divorce and co-parenting under two separate parenting agreements. I hope that my own experience with divorce and co-parenting sheds light on the realities of life after the divorce and helps you create an enduring agreement that is in the best interest of the entire family.

No matter where you are on your road to resolution, I can meet you there as an individual or a couple.

–Robin M. Mermans